im like a little child prancing around ..in need of something that cant be found ~
i dont know what why and how ..why my hallow soul longs for something somehow ..
every waking hour i cant explain what im feeling it has always been so dynamic that
im not certain what it is ..even though i try my best to find contentment from what i already have
i cant seem to ignore a certain longing .. its really hard to express specially when faced with the people around me
i dont want to be unfair not to anyone but ..why does it seem like my heart is empty ..most of the time
i envy a lot of things well ofcourse you wouldnt really notice ..
i play my character real cool which of course can make you think that im something ..
but at the end of the day when im all alone im all afraid of not knowing what am i really missing ?
i dont know am i or have i been trying so hard to be happy yet im bored ?
im i not satisfied with what i get out of all the things ive worked for ? no .. i dont think its money ..
yes it may be one partially but its not really it .. i have always been independent that i dont really rely on anyone but me
but why am i not that happy ? yes i have all the friends i need and a lover and every little secrets for satisfaction ..
could that be it ? am i lying to myself ? i think all these years i dont really have a solid peace of mind ..maybe im just
all chewed up by the everyday drama i get or probably worn out from all the stress ..one thing i know i really am stressed out
i think i need a vacation getaway ..just me somewhere someplace .. i need a big time off a real time off no phone calls no stupid arguments no fuss and fighting just me..i wonder how can i ever find the right answer to my stupid question ..what do i want ? what do i need ? it would take a real genius for someone to know what i need without asking me .. i think if i achieve that it will be my focal point my solid happiness its sad.. im sad ..i hope someday ill find out what i really want to know for sure that im fulfilled
I am a lonely and empty soul in need of peace~